I lie splattered on the ground, watching my blood slowly drain out. It was a sharp and painful tumble down the cliff and now my doom seems complete. I could cry out, but no on one would hear. I could despair into bitterness, but nothing would change. I could pray, but I still would have no hope. And if you're wondering how this happened, I met a dying woman...

It had been a pretty, sunny day as I drove along in my usual state of self-pity. My mind was absorbed and disturbed by my apparent lack of a future. All I could see was a giant gaping black hole. I did not understand the decisions of my past, why I had refused things that I achingly wanted. Agony was a hound I could not shake. I just could not understand. Why? Why???

But pulling me out of my thoughts was the lovely distraction of a woman's figure. She too had chosen this scenic route to drive upon and she had stopped to enjoy the view of the deep, vast canyon that edged the road. Perhaps she also was disturbed, I remember thinking. Maybe she was looking for solace in the beauty of nature. Maybe I wasn't the only one with problems.

But in her effort to be fashionable, her high heels were not suited to the rocky terrain and in what seemed like the twinkling of an eye I saw her slip, fall and slide to the edge of the railing, holding on for dear life. Reacting quickly, I swerved off the road and skidded on the gravel only a few feet away. Racing out the car door I was able - with a few terse moments - to retrieve her from her predicament and there was relief and smiles on both sides.

In the hero's role I was happy, my true identity hidden. So I winced when she asked my name. It's almost a curse for me to make a good first impression. I have this feeling that I must explain my life and all my predicaments so that they will "understand". But I didn't see I had any choice in this situation and I reluctantly forced out my name. Fortunately for me, she was too committed to her own life to notice my foibles.

In fact, she was quite gracious to me. Even funny. Getting up the nerve to look her in the eye, I saw her cute, fresh face for the first time. Her eyes were looking at me dead on but they held no contempt. They were eager to know me. It was probably due to the fact I saved her, I thought, not because she actually knew anything about me. Too fearful to shatter her delusion, I let her look at me.

Soon, she was retrieving me. Maybe she sensed my anxiety, but I was relaxed and communicating on a level I had not seen for a very long time. And I felt she had not put out such an effort in a very long time. Exhileration ran through my pumping heart. Hey, maybe I had a future after all. Maybe I was somebody. Dreams can come true. And I saw she too was experiencing a rejuvenation. "This is really great," I remember thinking. A flower had been born.

A couple of things did kind of bother me. I mean, when she told me she was married to a banker I did kind of suppress of couple of red flags there. She was so witty and sharp and vibrant, how could she be married to a man who held no real job? And sharing this side of her, I could tell this was something unusual for her - that she must have lead a selfish life. But still, the feeling between us was good and wholesome and the world was a better place. Let sleeping dogs lie.

The she looked at the time.

The change was abrupt - now that I think back on it - as if she had been snapped out of a dream. Later - too late - I learned she was to meet her husband there. And I could see love was ruthless in her mind. Any feelings for me had gone from being a blessing to an abhorrance. I wasn't a gift but a threat. Feelings for me were a violation of her marriage contract. Would she place me over her house and car and security? A panic welled up inside her. She remained gracious on the outside - smiling as I spoke of secret dreams and secret fears - and I was oblivious to anything being wrong.

And then it happened.

Next thing I knew I was taking my painful tumble down the cliff. It was so strange. The shock was so great I just couldn't believe it was happening. Bizarre explanations of earthquakes or explosions ran through my mind. I could not understand what was happening to me. But when I hit bottom it all came together - agony rage and heartbreak hurt. In the blowing wind of the canyon I heard an unknown voice: "It's dog-eat-dog wherever you go."

Vaguely I could see her husband pull up in his luxury car and the seemingly joyous hug of reunion she gave to him. No acknowledgement was made of me. I heard the faint click of their car doors slam as they receded back into their comfortable world. And I was left alone - again.

"What did I do wrong?" I cried out in frustration. "Is this for things I've done in the past? Is it because I was stupid to talk to a married woman? How can this happen? How can I live?"

Dusty winds blew dirt in my mouth in reply. I was on too much pain to move. I didn't trust me to do anything right anymore. It seemed no move was a safe move. I realized now what happened. She had made The Shift. She had changed from "What is right and what is wrong?" to "What will keep my things and what will not?" Her true dreams were dying and she used me to express it. Maybe that was my problem. Maybe I thought I wanted to be used...

Wolves are starting to gather around me. Will they eat me alive or wait till I'm dead? Oh God, oh Jesus, what happened to my life? I am about to rejoin the earth and I have never known love. But my thoughts turned to her - the woman of dying dreams - and I could only think to lay a final curse upon her life:

"I hope someday you fall in love."