The sun was bright as I sped down the proud, 
beautiful creation of the modern highway.  Safely
enveloped by the lining of concrete pillars, I
could sense my safety from the disorder and chaos
of the shimmering green nature I saw beyond.  I
was insulated, secure in this, the indestructable
product of our own will.  And yet, every fiber in
my being and cell in my body yearned to be free of
it.
   Deepening my anxiety was my car, an unbearable
burden that drained my resources and sapped my
patience.  This iron beast of torment was the
ruler of my world, putting me at the mercy of the
abitrary whims of its breakdowns.  The stress of
the struggle to maintain this god had hollowed me,
putting a frown on my face.  But this decrepit car
was a god I could not forsake, for without it I
would lose what little I had.  There was no way
out.
   I wondered how long I could keep this up.  How
long before the long arm of reality reached in to
rescue my soul but upend my world?  An unbearable
burden is exactly that, so what hope did I have?
What was I going to do?  WHAT WAS I GOING TO DO???
   But such was my lot, I thought.  No one would
have sympathy for me.  They would simply say, "Get
more money," as they did for the solution to
everything.  But the solution was the problem and
the soul knows not what money is.  No, money was
something man made up, a product of our own will.
   I was absorbed, thinkingly alone in my
thoughts, when a bursting, blaring ambulance
roared up behind.  I was terrified in its urgency,
as I could see the cars around me swerve.  I
swerved also as I saw them do to let it through.
But when the ambulance got closer, I could see in
my mirror the driver desperately waving me back to
the other side.
   Assuming he could see something from his higher 
perch, I complied as instructed.  But damned if he
didn't wave me back to the other side!
   "What the hell!" I said aloud.
   Fear and confusion invaded my pounding heart.
An inexplicable panic made me want to scream.
Finally, they passed me, rushing by with all the
sense of their emergency.  I was vaguely pissed
by the whole affair and was having trouble
regaining my composure.  For some reason, I felt
an icy grip take hold of me.
   And then, I saw the first hint of the terrors
to come.
   Something was happening up ahead.  Something
horribly wrong.  In an expert but futile maneuvre,
I saw the ambulance turn sideways to avoid an
object I could not see.  But it was too late.  It
crashed and smashed itself into a crumpled mess.
Getting closer, I could feel my own car losing
grip and when I looked out to the road I saw the
reason why.  Oil.  Someone or something had
fiendishly slickened the road into a virtual ice
rink.  And the carnage was colossal.
   "No!  NO!"
   It wasn't just the ambulance that had crashed,
but a line of cars of which I could not see the
end.  My desire was to stop.  Obviously it would
be insane to go down this road, a road with no
future.  But when I tried to slow down I was
viciously bumped from behind, an angry fist
shaking at me.  The driver yelled out his window.
   "Speed up, you moron!  Go now while we still
can!"
   My reply was to slow down again.  But again, he
would have no part of it.  In fact, they all
seemed to think as he did, everyone rushing and
competing for the open highway.  Another bump and
I would spin out of control.  It was every man for
himself.  I had no choice, keep pace or crash.  I
could not keep my bitterness inside.
   "Goddam, I hate people!  I'm so sick of this
shit!  Not once do I get to do what I want!  Get a
car, get a job, get money!  Fuck these assholes!
They know nothing about survival.  Nothing!  All
they know is dog-eat-dog!  Goddam these bastards!
Goddam them to hell.  I want out!!!"
   Cars honked and cursed me each time I tried to
slow down.  They were calling me insane!  But one
by one they joined the growing wreckage on the
side of the highway - and it was Hell on earth.
    Fury was their faces.   Acceptable madness
they had become, babies burning in the sun.
Arguments raged over who would pay.  Those found
not to have money were mercilessly beaten and
killed as their payment.  The rising steam of the
radiators and the wavy, smoldering heat gave the
scene the surreal dimension of a lost dream.
These were people without hope and they had been
exposed by the inevitable helplessness that comes
to us all.
   Those of us still driving, like scattering
cockraoches in the light, saw our chances for
survival slimming.  The  lanes were growing
narrower as the debris entruded further and
further onto the highway.  So naturally, everyone
sped up.
   I was resigned.  I don't know, maybe I was mad
myself - or maybe because this was the situation
I was always dealing with.  It just didn't seem
to bother me.  Not the chaos nor the savagery nor
the stupidity - it all just slid off my back.  I
couldn't save the world.  I couldn't even save me!
So I gave up and decided to do the one thing that
was bound not to work, but still had to try: trust
in Life.
   Even so panic started to creep in, my
tightening hands turning white.  My teeth locked
in tension.  My head started to swirl in the
disbelief of it all.  I just could not understand.
Was it all really happening or was it not?  Things
weren't supposed to get this bad.  Nothing like
this could happen they said.  And yet, my eyes did
not deceive me.
   Finally, it came down to me and one other car:
a big, black luxury sedan.  This was a real car,
not like the piece of junk I drove.  Its imposing
grill kept roaring up behind me, unable to pass
on the clogged highway.  I thought it pointless,
but I did my best to stay ahead.  One touch from
the monster from behind on my oil-slicked tires
and that would be the end of me.  Oh, the madness
of it!
   But to my surprise, it was the black behemoth
that spun out of control and crashed, finally
completing the blockage of the highway.  Others
would smash into it and still others more into
them.  No one else would pass through and I
wondered when the long line of destruction would
stop.  And so slowly my car came to a stop.
   Scattered across the highway in front of me
were human statues with their motionless shadows
in the late afternoon sun.  It was they who had
done it.  Without speaking a word, I knew it was
them.  A girl with a faint, faraway smile
approached my open window.
   "The beautiful irony about people devoted to 
evil is that they believe nothing bad will ever
happen to them."
   Then a chanting man came a-chanting,
   ""The days are coming," declares the
                 Sovereign Lord,
        "When I will send a famine through
                 the land -
   not a famine of food or a thirst for water,
          but a famine of hearing
           the words of the Lord.""
   The girl, who had spoken as a child who has
shown up her parents with a wisdom only she could
see, continued her explanation.
   "We did it," she triumphed.  "We saved the
world.  They wouldn't listen when we told them
they could not go on this way.  They just wouldn't
listen at all.  So we did it."  Her smile grew
larger but further away.  "We showed them they
could not lie.  Behold the terror of the truth."
   I smiled to myself and then spoke what I knew
to be true.  "Misfortune is the liar's blessing."
   This made her step back, her eyes drawing
inward.  But then her smile returned and she
looked favorably on me.  "Go," she urged, "Go and
seek your hope."
   "But where does hope lie?" I asked.
   She cocked her head like a confused puppy.  "I
do not know.  In terror I suppose.  Yes, terror
and control will make things right.  All I know
for sure is that hope does not lie in love, for no
one will believe it."
   Leaving her to ponder her thoughts, I moved on
down the road to the refuge of a motel.  I was
drained and exhausted as I flicked on the TV.  All
the stations had flocked to the scene.  The girl
and the other terrorists were dead, having
committed suicide.  Their dead bodies were cheered
but no one was happy.  For weeks and months all
who had a mouth gave their reasons on "just why
this happened", but they spoke only of themselves.
   For everyone already knew the truth but madly
they pretended to not know what they knew.  And
still they think nothing bad will happen to them.